Monday, November 13, 2006

Translucent Groupie

I weighed myself this morning, and learned that I have lost four pounds in the last two days. This diet works! I don’t know how much I have lost in the past 11 days, since I didn’t weigh myself when I started. However, I do feel leaner. At this rate, I’ll be looking my sexiest very soon. I feel healthier since I’m eating lots of fresh produce, taking a daily vitamin and drinking lots of water. I’ve never been on a diet before, so self discipline regarding food was never part of my life. I hate it because I love to cook--and I love to eat even more! I even decided to give up watching the Food Network, since I can’t try any new recipes that aren’t on the South Beach plan.

Early this morning, I spent a few minutes with my son on the sofa watching the Three Stooges. If you have never seen Curly do the Rumba, I highly recommend it. I laughed pretty hard between sips of my coffee. The Stooges are ridiculously entertaining, which is why I TiVo it for my son. It was a great break from cleaning up after pets and children all morning.

I also TiVo The View, but I usually only watch the hot topics portion of the show. Lately, Rosie O’Donnell has been gushing about her adoration of Barbra Streisand. She is completely obsessed with her in a way that is over-the-top. She seems to develop pretty wild crushes on other celebrities (Tom Cruise) and is not shy about her feelings. Her honesty is admirable and sweet in a way, but I don’t understand her level of intensity or the reason why she feels the need to see every single Barbra concert. I have never been that excited or addicted to anyone or anything.

Recently, I have discovered that maybe I am capable of being a stupid groupie. I have been infatuated with Phil Roy for a few weeks. However, I wouldn’t see multiple concerts or collect memorabilia or photos. I wonder why he likes the word Octopus. I need to stop listening to his music for a while. I don’t like feeling so syrupy over someone who is a stranger. I become mesmerized while watching his mouth and his mannerisms. Something about him has enraptured me, which brings this song to mind...

Fever Lyrics
Peggy Lee

Never know how much I love you, you never know how much I care
When you put your arms around me, I get a feeling that I just can't bear
You give me fever, when you kiss me, fever when you hold me tight
Fever in the morning, fever all through the night.

Bless my soul I love you, take this heart away
Take these arms I never use them
And just believe what my lips have to say
You give me fever, when you kiss me, fever when you hold me tight
Fever in the morning, fever all through the night

Listen to me baby, hear every word I say
No one can love you the way I do
Because they don't know how to love you my way
You give me fever, when you kiss me, fever when you hold me tight
Fever in the morning, fever all through the night

The sun lights up the daytime, the moon lights up at night
My eyes light up when you call my name,
Because I know you're gonna treat me right
You give me fever, when you kiss me, fever when you hold me tight
Fever in the morning, fever all through the night.
You give me fever, you give me fever, oh yeah,
Fever all through the night

*For the next few weeks, I am going to keep carbs and Phil’s music out of my body and mind, so I can start to feel like me again.


Bud said...

Getting thin without Phil, huh? Yeah, the stooges have always tickled me too.

Crazy Eddie said...

I frickin' love your blog. I love the way you write and can't get enough of the fact that you stopped tuning in to the Food Network... I love it.

I will definitely be coming back to your blog (you're really pretty too).

I'm always looking for new fag-hag recruits...

Thanks for the kind words by the way...


Jessica said...

Aw, thanks Eddie. You're sweet.
Fag hag has a nice?? ring to it, but I prefer to just be called a women with an open mind, who loves everyone in this life. ;-)

Matt-Man said...

I lost nearly 60 pounds by avoiding carbs...Keep up the good work Jess.

Jessica said...

Wow, what an incredible accomplishment, Matt. I am happy for you.

Ten pounds to go to my ideal weight...

Lisa said...

I love you!

Anonymous said...

Jess, you were always sexy.

Anonymous said...

Oh let's do lunch again soon.

Aisby said...

I don't know if I could give up the Food Network cold turkey. I tried the S.B. diet, and it worked for a while...I don't think I was ready to make a complete lifestyle the kids wouldn't eat it and I was making separate meals for them (that I would end up eating, too).

Janet said...

I used to pretty faithfully watch Rosie when she had her talk show. But then slowly reports started surfacing that she was not so nice to her staff. One thing in particular that bothered me was her no autographs policy. It completely contradicted everything she stood for with her obsessions with people like Tom Cruise and Barbra Streisand.

These days I'd much rather watch Ellen.:)

Elizabeth said...

I think we've all felt this way before, so don't sweat it. This too shall pass.